Need to rant a little.
I’ll start off with a scream and end on a sigh. Ready?
So, I’ve recognised I do not say all I want to anymore. I can’t be bothered with people and society. Mainly because uni has been sucking the life out of me like i’m some whore and it’s my pimp. Dirty analogy, I know.
I try and keep it 100 though, with everyone. But now I’ve pulled it back to only when I’m being spoken to and not just talking it when I see it, without my opinion being asked of. And it’s slightly easier on my mental processing, but I feel like I am lacking in life slightly? Hmm.
Another thing, why do people keep me in the dark. Not exactly like they’re keeping dirty secrets or anything (sometimes but hey it’s not like I’m shouting mine from the rooftops). It’s like positive stuff, e.g. I got a new job 6 months ago and I’m doing well. Life stuff like that I get really proud of for friends. I will be your big supporter in the audience as you run the track.
I’m not often to share wagwarn with me with everyone that asks. That’s because people have used it against me or I come off too strong and the devil is real. Also you don’t always care. But my “friends” should know I care. I got their backs. For real. They obviously seem not to know. I give people a bunch a joke, I can say nothing relevant and give a good laugh. I respect and value friendships and you know what ppl do??! They hide or don’t inform me of things- good or bad! If you’re struggling, me being me I’m here to listen and help if I can. If you’re winning, bro I will hi 5 and smile proudly with you. I’m not tryna pop champagne when the lights go on and when they’re off I’m gone- that is not me.
Anyhow, readers. This is a momentary thought that passed in the wind. Forreallythough. I’ve been mad busy and productive with uni and work experience. Maybe it’s the lack of me time I feel like all friends are crap. Dunno.
Now to end, the sigh.