I’m not sure where I’m going here

My friend asked me today, “How are you Ki?”

I replied, “Happy”

Today I’m content with life, pleased at recent decisions, full of smiles with gratitude and relieved that I didn’t fall asleep during a class today LOL.

Had an interesting conversation into the wee early morning when the crickets go for their walk. Was speaking to a friend about ….I think it started with ego then moved to belief, hope, will, the secret, who wrote the Bible and quite a few more deviations. To say I was challenged to think was an understatement, it was definitely a trying convo that made me think more and try to cast my decisions on what I believe and hold dear to my foundations. Yes, thanks for that. I usually don’t talk about such philosophical, who are you and what do you stand for questions especially at that time when I have work a few hours later. But I think maybe at this age I should start to find what I believe, am I a feminist or not, do I believe  in the concept of past shaping your present and there is no future, should natural hair be deemed better than permed hair or is hair hair, what is beauty (to me, us) and more. These aren’t huge topics but starting points I guess. I’ve seen great commentary on topics like hair, feminism, trivial racism (in a light joke and when people are genuinely taking the cake about races), women’s rights, black culture but I don’t have a stance- tbh I don’t usually care! Maybe to develop a more professional life and hold an opinion I should read on these topics that I’m sure years ago civil rights, feminism, racism really mattered to people.

Or maybe I’m rambling?

I am happy.

I want more though, I want to know more and broaden my knowledge and educational parameters that the education systems I’ve been in doesn’t seem to teach me. Not sure if I’ll feel the same next week, I don’t even know where to start or what to read first to get some background story. But atleast I can say I thought about it.

There’s a kid at school today that really made me think wow I am so not passionate. She’s a fiery person with spirit that she should really be more of a leader with her peers. Anyway, she spoke to me about politics and society and she isn’t even 16 mind you. Makes me feel ashamed that I really no longer engage in politics or care what Cameron and the other guy fight about unless my parents fuss enough about it that I recognise it actually affects my household. Similar to my ‘awesome teacher moment’ post I am somewhat being constantly compelled to look into things and hear others opinions on a topic. It’s good, I’m growing, I also get to impact kids lives and it makes me want to be clued up! Maybe I will put down a few romantic books, spend less on the cinema and read about society and current news. I’m not even sure what affects me- other than say if the rice farms no longer make rice and all chickens died in the world.


More like Haha. I am smart, well in comparison to others I used to think so. But what is smart, the depth of my knowledge or the ability to regurgitate others opinions or manmade (possibly proven) facts? Hmm. In the world I’m probably of average smarts, with a high IQ. No, that type of stuff doesn’t matter.

Recently got involved in a business that really made me realize education only gives information on stuff that’s either no longer current or for jobs that aren’t even around yet. What’s important is studying more and personally developing yourself. No I’m missing something there. But #YPRUK/OKNV helped me look a bit further into economy and where the jobs are (it looks bleak, and you should probably figure out what’s next). For that I’m grateful to be apart of an amazing family of people that bond and work hard to encourage and build with each other. I don’t think that’s even relevant to the post, I’m done now.

I’m happy and I want more knowledge so I can be well rounded, well travelled, well cultured and greatly educated to add to my repertoire of being a tall, fine young woman.

😉 xx

Connect with me on twitter to read about my Spanish journey thus far: @es_hmmkiki


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