The tiring job search

Like the executive planner that I am, I saved a lot for when I came back hence I made it to my 3k saving goal in 5 months. Let me address that quickly:

When you set a goal ensure it’s very specific and you measure it properly. I set “save 3k”, I didn’t say in a savings account in GBP- that’s where I fell short.

Moving on, I saved so I was actually doing well (meaning not even touching 1k) until a week after Morocco in June in time with when JSA actually paid me.

I went on the dole because, why wouldn’t I have someone help keep me accountable and back my corner as I look for work? Why not get a free pittance that covers my monthly car insurance and sim contract as well as petrol and coins in the offering bucket? Realistically that’s all it did, it tided over my Euros-saving/current-account-into-my-British-current-account money. I struggled with actually voicing it to anyone: that was pride and ego and I shouldn’t have felt ashamed in any way because it was just an allowance and I knew what my finances look like in general. I never speak bad of anyone on the dole (USA)/jobseekers (UK) that are actively looking for work. Do what you gotta do and make what needs to be made.

My initial interview ended up in a 30 minute discussion on the education system, teaching and travel with a cute manager. This guy knew I was only here for a tide over and guidance in finding the job. My actual JSA lady was incredible, we got joke when I briefly saw her as she does not like 10 minute meetings since my head is one of a few that is actually screwed on. I appreciated meeting her because she was honest with me about some of my choices, decisions and ways I went about things (that transcended into my personal life improving). For my last sign on, I thanked her and I genuinely wish her well because she knew I was going to get a job even when I was disheartened after not getting something sooner.

I could have gone back in to work quicker but I wanted a full time job so didn’t ask my old contacts because I really would have worked 3 jobs and stayed busy but off target. It was good that I had those roller coaster of emotions throughout the job search:

  • Another 20 click apply applications today brilliant (indeed, cvlibrary)
  • 3 good applications for decent schools this week
  • Oo what about a flight attendant, well being practitioner, coding, hotel front desk manager, hospital admin, BT customer service, in a bank, as a dancer, car driver… and other miscellaneous roles.
  • Great an interview today, the second interview this week for that place last week (education)
  • What kind of job and place of work is this? (sales)
  • Yaay we can wear jeans! (BT)
  • Shit, that was a waste of my make up and 30 minutes drive if they weren’t even going to give it to me.
  • Who the f is paying my petrol? Where can I apply for expenses back?
  • Wait pro rata said what now? Am I worth that, should I take it if I get it? (I’m grateful I didn’t get it)

A lot of things go through my mind. I’m used to activity, business, movement, being very involved and that hasn’t happened for 3 months. I’ve not worked for 3 months. I’ve sat at home for so long that I can’t keep track of dates and times of day. I now go to bed at 9pm because I’m that bored and not motivated.

In the fist month I was here to help mom and get my Spanish documents sorted which was very difficult and infuriating. I still haven’t translated them but at least I have them- anyone wanna drop me £65 including postage? By the way I did get a job after maybe 200 applications, the 4th week and on my 3rd interview, it just wasn’t in my career plan so I kept going at it and will continue to do so until I get to what I want.

That’s that; the dole was there and it pushed pride aside, I was heavily bored and demotivated for 3 months and have considered (meaning cried many a night) if moving was right. It was, I need to learn to believe in myself from my own belief fountain and not others.

These views are mine and I am no way saying that 3 months is a long time to be out of work, on average, it isn’t.

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